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Home Alone (KlaskyCsupoRockz Style)/Transcript
=Main= *''This article is a stub. You can help The Parody Wiki by expanding it.'' This is a transcript for Home Alone (KlaskyCsupoRockz Style). *(KlaskyCsupoRockz presents) *(Home Alone (KlaskyCsupoRockz Style)) *(People chattering) *Dora: Steve's brother and his family are here. Oh, it's crazy. Miranda, uh-huh. Oh, that's right, her family's there. When do you leave? You're not ready, are you? *Periwinkle: Dora, Thomas won't let me watch the movie, but the big kids can. Why can't I? *Dora: Peri, I'm on the phone. When do you come back? Not till then? *Periwinkle: It's not even rated R. He's just being a jerk. *Dora: Peri, if Thomas says no, then it must be really bad. No, we're not bringing the dog. We're putting him in the kennel for the... Hey, get off! Periwinkle, out of the room. *Periwinkle: Hang up the phone and make me, why don't ya? *Dora: Oh, this kid. *Steve: Hey, did you, by any chance, pick up a voltage adaptor thing? *Dora: No, I didn't have time to do that. *Steve: Well, how am I supposed to shave in France? *Dora: Grow a goatee. *Periwinkle: Steve, nobody'll let me do anything *Dora: Okay, adios. *Steve: You don't have anything to do? I've got something for you to do, you can pick up those micromachines that are all over in there. Blue stepped on one and almost broke her neck. *Dora: He was in the garage again playing with the glue gun. *Steve: Didn't we talk about that? *Periwinkle: Did I burn down the joint? I don't think so. I was makin' ornaments out of fish hooks. *Steve: My new fish hooks? *Periwinkle: I can't make ornaments out of the old ones, with dry worm guts stuck on 'em. *Dora: Steve. *Steve: Come on, Peri. Out. *Blue: (Barks Steve, Dora, do you guys have a voltage adaptor?) *Steve: Here, here's a voltage adaptor! *Blue: (Barks Oh, God, you're too heavy! Go pack your suitcase.) *Periwinkle: Pack my suitcase? *Sidetable: Do you know where the shampoo is, Slippery? *Slippery: I don't live here. *Sidetable: I don't live in a house with this many people and no shampoo. *Delete: Pardon me, are your parents home? *Sidetable: Yeah, but they don't live here. *Diego: Sidetable, did you order the pizza? *Sidetable: Mailbox did. *Delete: Exuse me, mister. Are your parents home? *Diego: My parents live in Paris. *Baby Jaguar: (Meows Sorry.) *Delete: Hi. *Isa: Hi. *Delete: Are your parents home? *Isa: Yeah. *Delete: Do they live here? *Isa: No. *Delete: No. Why should they? All kids, no parents. Probably a fancy orphanage. *Periwinkle: I don't know how to pack a suitcase. I never done this once in my whole life. *Benny: Tough. *Periwinkle: That's what Pail said. *Pail: What did I say? *Benny: You told Periwinkle "Tough." *Pail: The dope was whining about a suitcase. What am I supposed to do? Shake his hand and say "Congratulations, you're an idiot"? *Periwinkle: I'm not an idiot! *Pail: Oh, really? You're completely helpless! Everyone has to do everything for you. *Benny: She's right, Peri. *Periwinkle: Excuse me, puke-breath. I'm a lot smaller than you. I don't know how to pack a suitcase. *Shovel: Hey, I hope you didn't just pack crap, Benny. *Benny: Shut up, Shovel. *Periwinkle: You know what I should pack? *Benny: Mailbox told you, cheek-face. Toilet paper and water. *Shovel: So Peri, what are you so worried about? You know Dora's gonna pack your stuff, anyway. *Tico: You're what the French call les incompetents. *Periwinkle: What? *Benny: Bombs away! *Shovel: P.S. You have to sleep on the hide-a-bed with Slippery. If he has something to drink, he's gonna wet the bed. *Periwinkle: This house is so full of people, it makes me sick! When I grow up and get married, I'm livin' alone! Did you hear me? I'm livin' alone! I'm livin' alone! *Boots: Who's gonna feed your spider while we're gone? *Mailbox: He just ate a load of mice guts. He should be good for a couple of weeks. Is it true the French babes don't shave their pets? *Boots: Some don't. *Mailbox: But they got nude beaches. *Boots: Not in the winter. *(Tape playing, rewinding) *Periwinkle: Mailbox? *Mailbox: Don't you know how to knock, phlegmwhat? *Periwinkle: Can I sleep in your room? I don't wanna sleep on the hide-a-bed with Slippery. If he has a drink, he'll wet the bed. *Mailbox: I wouldn't let you sleep in my room if you were growing on my ass. *(Object clattering) *Mailbox: Check it out. Big Bird. *Boots: Who's he? *Mailbox: You ever heard of the South Bend Shovel Slayer? *Boots: No. *Mailbox: That's him. Back in '58, he murdered his whole family in half on his block... ...with a snow shovel. Been hiding out in this neighborhood ever since. *Boots: Well, if he is a shovel slayer, how come the cops don't arrest him? *Mailbox: Not enough evidence to convict. They never found the bodies. But everyone around here knows he did it. It'll just be a matter of time... ...before he does it again. *Boots: What's he doing now? *Mailbox: He walks up and down the streets every night... ...salting the sidewalks. *Boots: Maybe he's just trying to be nice. *Mailbox: No way. See that garbage can full of salt? That's where he keeps his victims. The salt turns the bodies into mummies. *Periwinkle: Mummies! *(Big Bird shovels the snow, Big Bird looks at Periwinkle, Boots, and Mailbox) *Mailbox: Look out! *(Tires screeching) *(SpongeBob picks up the statue) *Delete: How you kids doing up? Good? Lot of action around here today, huh? Going on vacation? Where you going? You hear me, or what? Going on a trip? Where you going, kid? *(Door knocks) *(Door opens) *SpongeBob: Okay, that's 122.50. *Delete: Not from me, kid. I don't live here. *SpongeBob: Oh. You're just around for the holidays? *Delete: I guess you could say that. *Thomas: Hey, pizza's here! There you go. *SpongeBob: That's 122.50. *Thomas: It's my brother's house. He'll take care of it. *Delete: Hey, listen... *Steve: Hey. *Delete: Hi. Are you Steve Burns? *Steve: Yeah. *Delete: The Steve Burns who lives here? *Steve: Yes. *SpongeBob: Good, because somebody owes me 122.50. *Delete: I'd like a word with you, sir. *Steve: Am I under arrest or something? *Delete: No, no, no, It's, uh..., Christmas time. There's always a lot of bulglaries around the holidays. So we're just checking the neighborhood to see if the proper precautious are taken. *Steve: Oh, yeah, well, we have automatic timers for our lights, locks for our doors. That's about as well as anybody can do in these days, right? Did you get some eggnog or something like that? *Mailbox: Come on, Steve. Let's eat. *Delete: Eggnog? *Periwinkle: Pizza! Pizza! *Delete: Listen, are you gonna be leaving on... *Periwinkle: Pizza! *Dora: Grab yourself a napkin and you're gonna have to pour your own drinks. *Tickety: Dora, does Santa Claus have to go through customs? *Slippery: What time do we have to go to bed? *Thomas: Early. We're leaving the house at 8 a.m. On the button. *Dora: I hope you're all drinking milk. I wanna get rid of it. *Steve: SpongeBob needs 122.50, plus tip. *Dora: For pizza? *Thomas: 10 pizzas times 12 bucks. *Blue: (Barks Thomas, you've got some money.) *Thomas: Travelers checks. *Dora: Forget it, Thomas. We have cash. *Thomas: You probably got the checks that don't work in France. *Periwinkle: Did anyone order me a plain cheese? *Mailbox: Oh, yeah, we did. But if you want any, somebody's gonna have to barf it all up. 'Cause it's gone. *Dora: Slippery, go easy on the pepsi. *Mailbox: Peri! Peri, get a plate! *(Mailbox barfs) *Periwinkle: RAAAHHH!!! *(Milk spills) *Slippery: Wow! *Tico: What do you mean? *(Pepsi spills on pizza) *Steve: Passports! *Thomas: Watch it! *(Shouting continues) *Thomas: No, no. *Steve: Get these passports out of here. *Blue: (Barks Are you okay, honey? Come here. You all right?) *Dora: What is the matter with you? *Periwinkle: He started it! He ate my pizza unpurpose. He knows that I hate sausage and olives and... *Thomas: Look what you did, you little jerk. *(Everyone staring at Periwinkle) *Dora: Periwinkle, get upstairs right now. *Periwinkle: Why? *Benny: Periwinkle, you're such a disease. *Periwinkle: Shut up. *Steve: Peri, upstairs! *Dora: Say good night, Periwinkle. *Periwinkle: Good night, Periwinkle. *Pail: Now what's for dinner? *Isa: Your brother's such a jerk. *Sidetable: Like we don't know. *Periwinkle: Why do I get treated with scum? *Dora: Oh. I'm sorry. This house is just crazy. We've got all these kids running around. My brother droved in from Ohio, today, It's just nuts. *Periwinkle: How come you didn't bring more cheese pizzas? *SpongeBob: Nice tip. Thanks alot. *Dora: Thanks. *Delete: Having a reunion or something? *Dora: No. My husband's brother transferred to Paris last summer and told his kids he's still going to school here and I guess he misses the whole family, he's giving us all this trip to Paris for the holiday, so we'll be together. *Delete: You're taking a trip to Paris? *Dora: Yes, We have to leave tomorrow morning. *Delete: Excellent. Excellent. *Dora: If you'll exuse me, this one's a little out of sorts. I'll be right back. *Delete: Don't worry about me. I spoke to your husband already. And don't worry about your home. It's in good hands. *Dora: There are 16 people in this house, and only you have to make trouble. *Periwinkle: I'm the only one getting dumped on. *Dora: You're the only one acting up. Now get upstairs. *Periwinkle: I am upstairs, dummy. *(Door opens) *Periwinkle: The third floor? *Dora: Go. *Periwinkle: It's scary up there. *Dora: Don't be silly. Slippery'll be up in a little while. *Periwinkle: I don't wanna sleep with Slippery. You know about him. He wets the bed. He'll pee all over me. I know it. *Dora: Fine. We'll put him somewhere else. *Periwinkle: I'm sorry. *Dora: It's too late. Get upstairs. *Periwinkle: Everyone in this family hates me! *Dora: Then maybe you should ask Santa for a new family. *Periwinkle: I don't want a new family. I don't want any family. Families suck! *Dora: Just stay up there. I don't want to see you again for the rest of the night. *Periwinkle: I don't want to see you again for the rest of my whole life. I don't want to see anybody else either. *Dora: I hope you don't mean that. You'd feel pretty sad if you woke up tomorrow morning and you didn't have a family. *Periwinkle: No, I wouldn't. *Dora: Then say it again. Maybe it'll happen. *Periwinkle: I hope I never see any of you jerks again. *(Door closes) *(Periwinkle goes in bed) *Periwinkle: (Thinking) I wish they would all just disappear. *(Clouds pass by from the moon) *(Window shutters rattling) *(Branch cracking) *(Beeps) *(Wires electriting) *(The power goes out) *(Knocking) Category:Article stubs Category:Home Alone movie-spoofs Category:Home Alone Movie Spoofs Category:Transcripts